It's taken me three months to watch 5 seasons of PLL (I'm about to start the sixth..) and over that time I have accumulated a lot of questions about this dumb-ass yet so addictive show.
If you are unaware of what Pretty Little Liars is, it's a t.v. show aired on ABC Family. In short, it's about 4 girls who are consistently threatened by this anonymous texter/emailer/weirdo who needs to find a serious hobby named 'A' who threatens to reveal all the lies they keep if they don't comply with whatever the hell he decides to threaten them with each episode. This follows the death of their ringleader Alison and the series follows them as they try to uncover who A is and who killed Alison.
A LOT happens and changes between the first and fifth series and if I were to explain absolutely everything that goes down I think I'd be here till Christmas.
Of 2020.
"I am 100% sure I did not wear 6inch heels when I was in school?"
- And I'm also pretty sure my school had major rules regarding dress but apparently not in Rosewood. When I was 16 I don't think I could even walk in heels. I rang up my sister one night at like 1am whilst I was at uni and started to ask her why the hell this show is so flashy and dumb. Apparently ABC Family is flashy and dumb.
Also I would have gotten serious bunions by now.
"Do people in Rosewood survive only on coffee?"
- Yes, which probably explains why everybody is so high-wired and f*cking crazy. Since watching this t.v. show I have bought a coffee filter and various packets of different filter coffees and have been absolutely loving life. This leads to another question: "what kind of magic teeth whitener are these girls using?" because I'm pretty sure after all those coffee granules grinding up on ma grill, my teeth should be some dirty shade of brown by now.
"Why does that man have painted-on abs?"
- I can't remember what season this was but there is a scene at some point where Ezra opens his flat door to Aria and he's stood shirtless. A milestone in the viewers relationship with the couple, as it shows that their physical relationship is furthering and because Ezra is this kind of indie bookish type (so corny) I think they expected the viewers to get a bit hot under the school-collar. Except this was some kind of nasty RPatz-Twilight drawn-on-abs kinda thing. Minus the wonky nipple situation.
"Is this network allergic to bra's or something...?"
- because every time a character gets changed I swear the bra disappears but reappears once we see them fully clothed...ft a fully fledged cleavage that can't be achieved minus bra.
And this has nothing to do with women and liberating them or whatever, I just made an observation. A super annoying one that I now can't ignore.
"Why would you live in a town that possesses nothing more than a coffee shop and a mental institution?"
- Ok for real, people in this programme are constantly slipping away to bigger, nearby cities for errands they can't run in their tiny hometown, so how the hell is a mental institution placed there. That's literally on the same level as having a country village consisting of a pub, a corner shop and then just plonking a correctional facility right in the middle of it. It just wouldn't happen.
"Is that that woman from that creepy, old time television show about 3 witch sisters?"
- Oh, yes, it is.
(Charmed, is that old time t.v. programme by the way)
"Is that Rob Lowe's brother?"
- Again, much to everybody's satisfaction, yes it is.
"How am I expected to believe these girls are two years younger than I am?"
- I know when the programme started, the girls were 16. I think American television has this unwritten rule of employing actors to play roles of people approx. 40 years younger than they are. No but seriously, Troian Bellisario is 29 in real life. There is probably more of an age gap between her and myself than there is between her and the woman who is supposed to play her own mother.
"How has that teacher man not been arrested yet?"
- Teacher man being Ezra, of course. Lets not pretend that if this programme was real life, 1) none of this crazy shit would have gone down but more importantly 2) A whole town would not just be miraculously okay with a teacher having a relationship with one of his students. I JUST DON'T GET IT (apart from the fact it is absolute fiction).
This entire post makes me sound a bit of a dud but I just sit and watch this show consistently with a huge cartoon question mark hanging above my head. Has anyone else had tehse actual thoughts whilst sitting watching the show??
The obsession has me in some kind of hold and I am SO excited to start on season 6 (mostly so i can feed this obsession onto other programmes, OITNB season 3 I'm looking at you)
Kisses
-A
(I mean, xxrachelhelen.....bitches)
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